International Women's Day - Meet Kelly Cummings

I’m Kelly of KJC Counselling and I provide 1:1 counselling for women navigating grief, loss and life transitions including perimenopause, relationship changes and loss of identity.  I provide this support online, via the telephone or in person at my therapy room at The Manse, in Banbury.  I share this space with Jo at Fresh Minds Therapy who I met when we started our training, and we have since become incredibly good friends and peers.

Having been a commercial surveyor for a number of years I decided to retrain as a counsellor following two significant family bereavements.  I left surveying to work at Katharine House Hospice, before leaving to set up KJC Counselling.

There was a particular moment during my training when I thought this is what I want to do and that I made the right decision to retrain.  Whilst I cannot disclose the exact details, I am able to say that working with a peer and the feedback they gave me will always be with me.  My training also made me realise that my dad, who is no longer with us, has been and continues to be the biggest influence on me and my journey in becoming a counsellor.

One of the biggest challenges I have faced has been the shift from working a “typical” 9-5 job to the flexible hours of running a counselling practice.  It took some time, but I have embraced the flexibility that I now have.

Self-doubt and imposter syndrome come and go but as a counsellor I have regular supervision and a good support network.  These along with my own reflections enable me to work through those feelings.

As clique as it sounds raising my family is the achievement I am most proud of so far.  Success for me is being happy, respected for the work I do so that people will want to work with me again or recommend me to someone else and being proud of who I am and what I have done.  Success is now more personal, am I happy with what I am doing, have I done my best, am I the best that I can be. How I measure success now is different to when I first started working.   

Honesty, trust, fairness, compassion, safety and a counsellor’s core conditions of empathy, congruence and unconditional positive regard are the values that guide the way I work.  I always want to ensure everyone is heard, listened to, and supported and this is how I conduct myself both personally and in business.  I always aim to treat people how I would like to be treated. 

I am proud that I was a woman in male dominated profession at the start of my working life.  Proud that I set an example to my daughter that you can be whatever you want to be.  I feel very passionate about women being represented and visible in business especially as a large number of women struggle in so many ways, especially with navigating work and perimenopause.  I think now is an interesting time as more women are being open about their experiences which encourages other women to find their voice.

My advice is to have a good support network around you, people you trust, that can listen and advise you honestly.  I wish I had believed in myself and my abilities earlier.  Being organised, openminded, approachable, fair and authentic have contributed most to my success.

I am looking forward to the training that I will be undertaking in the Spring and Autumn which will enhance my counselling practice, which will include group facilitation.  I am looking forward to growing my practice and my own personal development.

Balance is the key and I will always ensure that if work is tipping the scales more than my personal life then I will look to remedy that by booking in lunch with a friend, a weekend away, seeing family or just sitting reading a book. It works the other way as well and if client sessions are lighter then I will ensure I undertake some educational reading as I cannot stop buying books or sign up for a short course. 

For me it is not so much about what motivates me but working out why it is a tough day and what can I do/what do I need to work through it.

One word for my journey: Eventful.
Best advice I’ve received: Trust and believe in yourself.
Unusual hobby: Word searches and colouring in.
Early mornings or late nights? Early mornings. 

If you would like to find out more, please contact Kelly at KJC Counselling